I was a top performer academically during my secondary school and polytechnic days. Many around me naturally expected that I would continue to excel wherever I go. However, that was not the case. When I embarked on my studies at a local university, I was neither coping nor performing. Regardless the amount of time and effort put into revision, I still failed for most of my subjects. My confidence took a great hit then, especially when it seems like I was the only one not doing well. I then started experiencing moments of anxiety and mental breakdowns as I was afraid of being judged for my failure and not being able to live up to the expectation of others. Things got worse when my parents were going through a divorce.
Afraid of appearing weak, I started to bottle things up to myself and kept a distance away from my friends and family. But that did not help me to feel better. Instead, I had more frequent episodes of anxiety and breakdowns. I also started to lose my appetite and interest in things that I used to enjoy. All these eventually led me to visit a doctor.
Fortunately, I have very supportive friends and family who were aware of my condition. They stayed by my side, encouraged and supported me unwaveringly even when I decided to drop out of school to recover. They gave me space when I needed it, and taught me to appreciate the little things in life and to celebrate small wins. Slowly, I started to open up and make baby steps to regaining my confidence again.
Through this episode, I have learnt that we should never be afraid to open up and seek comfort, help, and support from the people around us. You will be surprised to know that there are many people around who genuinely care for you. And it is these pillars of support that will help you to pull through all the difficult moments in life.